the jcc had individual screens on each machine...a guard who half-assedly glanced inside the car when we pulled into the garage, pastel schedules with mind/body classes, wine specials in the lobby. E fell off the elliptical machine -- the drawstring on his vibram shoe unfit for indoor activities and all of its crevices, pulleys, plastic shields and foot plates. for a moment he just laid there, unamused, his back arched along the snailhump of the machine's rear wheel. a large plastic cover fell off and rolled to a sad cradling wobble on the floor. E ambled to his feet, ignored the damage, and found a new machine.
a girl with a lanyard placed a sign on the machine within minutes "This Machine Is Temporarily Out of Order. We are aware of this situation and an attendant has been notified. A technician will be remedying the situation shortly. Thank you for your patience". perhaps a first line of defense against riotous dawn-loving gym goers? and "remedying"?? inbox gained a 1, hugged by parentheses, subject line: so gd funny!!!! focus on this. get this out of the way first, then find out what is so gd funny!!!!!
E picked a machine 11 treadmills to the left, where he could still see me in the mirror. occasionally, he would speed up when he saw that his up down up down had synchronized or fallen behind mine.or maybe he saw nick the trainer, his secret crush. he had a towel, but when the sweat dripped he used his hand to swat at in a malarial stupor.
the (1) burned brighter...what is so gd funny!!!!!! ?
"Just touching base + seeing if you might have some time next week..." might, may...should "touching" and "seeing" really hold hands in the same sentence for an unknown entity?
click.
smelly trees! smelly trees in boston...a common spooge tree...all interspliced by text-inspired "ads by google".
this tree seems to be really popular around greater Boston. it has 5 white petals on each flower and the leaves look similar to this alternate drawing. the worst part is that while it's flowering, the tree smells like semen or vagina, depending on who you ask. what kind of tree is it? it's definitely not the Chinese chestnut
make it conversational, casual, friendly...don't overthink it. don't second guess and start splitting verbal atoms.
Don't feel bad. I was recently at a friends house and smelled semen all evening, finally realizing it was that damn tree. One of their housemates had taken a branch of the flowers and put them in a vase. They looked like the ones in the third picture from turgid dahlia's post.
click. reply. HAHAHA so what are the sperm trees actually called?? "common spooge tree" ha.
send.
oh.my.GOD. gym brain. distraction and laughter. too many windows open closes one big port cullis. possibly nails it shut. maybe it sounds editorial. maybe spooge is an actual tree? consulting google... Also known as “the spooge tree”, because its blooms smell like semen. Using an annoying and invasive intruder to take out another annoying and invasive intruder…that’s absolutely brilliant.
no redemption.
The Web's Bitter Afterbirth. Cruel.com's squeal sequel, worshipping coarse & offensive satire, the ridiculous and subslime in ...
maybe she's from boston. maybe this is a google query she has been dying to investigate -- and look, research is done and delivered. maybe spooge means springtime where i'm from. some clever explanation, some anecdotal reasoning for saying "spooge" to a perfect and professional stranger is in order... Scientific name: Ailanthus altissima (Mill.) Swingle.
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